What if She Has A Boyfriend?

boyfriendI had a student ask me yesterday, “I met a girl with a boyfriend. How do I get her?”

My first response was, “Why chase a girl with a boyfriend? There are plenty of single women out there. You just have to look.”

Ok you damn home wreckers…

Women will tell you that they have a boyfriend for two reasons:

They aren’t feeling you. “I have a boyfriend,” is a knee jerk reaction. She might even find you a little bit attractive, but chances are she doesn’t know you very well at all, and the boyfriend line will give her some distance.

She has a boyfriend, as the majority of hot women do. Because they’re hot, they have many options.

In my lifetime I’ve had many women offer themselves to me. Unfortunately, these usually aren’t be the type of girls I desired. These girls were usually friends of friends or work colleagues. I have actually used the excuse, “Sorry I have a girlfriend.” So I’m guilty of this cowardly excuse, but guess what? It worked. They backed off.

Yes. Sometimes I turn down sex. Often actually.

I’ve also been in situation where I was in a relationship and because certain attractive women in my social circle knew I was in a relationship, they hit on me. This is the female competitiveness of pre-selection at work. And this situation is VERY hard to deny. But I’ve not cheated on a girl yet.

This is also why I rarely go monogamous.

So, if you’re hell bent on stealing some poor guys girl, there is a solution:

  • Be better than him
  • Be more popular, more fun, more interesting, more exciting, funnier, handsomer, smarter and richer.
  • Basically you need to have sick game.
  • You learn to have sick game by following the path of the seductionist. You go out as often as possible to approach women and practice your skillset.
  • You work out, diet, and get into great shape.
  • You fix your fashion and grooming
  • You increase your social status by doing cool things that get people talking about you.
  • You read tons of books so that your head is filled with interesting thoughts.
  • You create a large social circle of interesting people that say good things about you.

This list could go on, and on. But basically if you want a girl to either change her tune and suddenly become single for you, just show her how awesome you are. If you want her to dump her boyfriend for you, well, good luck.


It’s always the next girl. If you live in a city there are probably a thousand single women in your neighborhood you could meet. So why get all bent on some girl who told you she has a boyfriend.

Go out today, and approach five beautiful women. Then go out tonight, and approach ten more. Do this for 30 days. I guarantee you that you will no longer care or think about this woman who has a boyfriend.

But if you MUST have this girl, even though she told you she has a borefriend, here’s your magic technique:


Add her on Facebook and make flirty banter with her.

Text her.

Call her.

And keep asking her out, for a drink, a walk, a coffee. Because unless you’re persistent she will probably forget about you. Women just have too many distractions. Smart phones, laptops, Netflix, texting, and all that.

And have patience. A year’s worth if need be, to gain her trust. Seriously, she might be with this other guy for two years. So buckle down for the long haul of friend zone.

Just warning you, if she isn’t interested you’re going to be labeled a creepy-douchebag-stalker. But hey, you wanted the girl with a boyfriend. You might have a shot, but you’ll never know unless you try. But as your humble advisor I suggest you go meet more women.


  1. noob says

    Going after that ONE girl with a b/f and the sacrifices of that (creep/annoy her or friend zoned at best, not meeting new girls during that period), just doesn’t seem like a feasible option at all. Especially the mental toll of constantly thinking of that ONE girl…it sucks.
    Also some typos – tyoe, borefriend

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