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What To Say To Girls

rrrrThe number one complaint I hear from my students is, “I don’t know what to say.” This statement to me sounds like a cricket singing its song, or a mouse fart. I don’t think I’ve ever had a student in four years that didn’t know what to say.

You’re not alone. You’re not unique. Your problems aren’t different and you’re not special.

And that’s a good thing! Because it means you can learn verbal game, just like the rest of us.

The days of routines are behind us. In the old days, puas memorized long lists of memorized comedy strips. The routines seemed to work because they were designed to push emotional buttons, eliciting reactions from the women. The problem was, it turned men into social robots. It didn’t really teach men how to improvise, just to parrot. When the routines ended, so did the game.

So how do you improve your verbal game?

That’s easy. You practice.

Most of my clients come from computer based work. They are programmers, technicians and so forth. They spend most of their day’s in-front of a screen, and not interacting with other humans, especially not women. Building your verbal game skills is the same as building muscles—after all, your brain is a muscle (I’m not an expert in biology, but work with me.)

For my verbally stunted students, I give the same advice.

1. Stay in the interaction for two minutes. Do not eject from your set because you can’t think of what to say next. That’s like me putting down the pen and playing Battlefield because I can’t think of what to write next. Instead of running away, stay with the interaction, no matter how uncomfortable, and keep talking. I don’t care if you talk about the weather, or your favourite colour. All that matters is you work that muscle for a minimum of two minutes. Even if she back turns you, tap her on the shoulder and keep blabbing. Stick to this rule, it is very critical for your development.

2. Improv lessons. I’ve taken them and found it very, very helpful. I’ve sent students to improv and watched their ability to improvise skyrocket. Just Google “Improv lessons,” plus your city, pay the fee and join the class.

Now let’s focus on content.

1. Avoid logic. Nothing is as boring to a woman as logic. In a conversation I always try to stick to topics that elicit emotion. “So what’s your view on penis size?” Or, “Would you rather be a Unicorn or a Killer Whale?” Or, “Where do you want to travel?” Anything that forces her to engage her imagination will put you on the path to her bed.

2. Give value first. Approaching a woman and asking, “What’s your name?” Or, “Where are you from?” Or, “Do you come here often,” is lame, lame, lame. You’re asking her for something before you’ve given. It is cliché and boring. With your opener, make sure you give her some value. Make her giggle, or engage her emotions first. After you’ve entertained her slightly, then you can ask logistical questions. Hopefully she will ask you first.

3. You don’t have to be funny, but it helps, a lot. The key to humour is to amuse yourself. You don’t lay up a joke in the hope that it will make her laugh. If your joke makes you laugh, and you’re having fun, then other like-minded people will also find it funny. If she doesn’t get your humour, you don’t have chemistry.

4.  Unless you plan to go direct, save compliments for after she is invested. Even then, use them sparingly. This is a controversial subject. The issue of, “Push Pull,” is hotly contested. Do you need to tease a woman, to say things like, “Well, you’re not really my type, but I’ll give you a shot?” It depends on her personality type. I’ve found, the hottest girls react well to playing, “Hard to get.” Hot women are so used to men drooling and complying with all their demands, they almost find it sickening. But if she earns your respect by investing, you can give her a compliment. I usually save compliments on her looks for when she’s riding on top of me. But that’s just me.

5. Don’t laugh before she does. This is a sign of insecurity. Of course there are exceptions, like if what you said is so hilarious you can’t help it. But most of the time it works like a laugh track on a bad tv show. It’s transparent and lame.

6. Read books. We spend far too much time with tv and Internet and video games. Books expand your vocabulary, your worldly knowledge and engage your cerebral cortex. I believe you should stay on top of pop-culture, but reading ten books will do more for your verbal game than one hundred hours of digital media.

7.  Practice. It might take a few years, but you won’t grow if you don’t practice. By practice, I mean as often as possible. Five days a week for a year. If you’re not willing to work hard and pay the price, you will never develop the skill.

I hope this helps.

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6 Comments

  1. > 2. Give value first. Approaching a woman and asking, “What’s your name?” Or, “Where are you from?” Or, “Do you come here often,” is lame, lame, lame. You’re asking her for something before you’ve given. It is cliché and boring. With your opener, make sure you give her some value. Make her giggle, or engage her emotions first. After you’ve entertained her slightly, then you can ask logistical questions. Hopefully she will ask you first.

    Any examples? This is perhaps the part I’m struggling with the most. I’m usually logical, introverted, and analytical that coming up with something emotionally engaging at will is very hard and takes a long time.

    1. I open with something sort of joking like “Hey your gorgeous, I’m (name)” then you start talking to her and get her name later. If you want to mess with her emotions I suggest first look at your environment-by that I mean look at where you both are and where you plan on meeting her- then bring up something such as if your in a park during spring time say something sweet and poetic, “the weather truly compliments the flowers making the colors more vibrant”, then pick one up and smell it. This is just my idea of how to do it.

  2. Examples:
    She (or anyone) opens an umbrella inside. -> “Thats bad luck.”

    Your bixiing and she passes you. After you catch up -> “Your so fast!”

    She asks you how your doing. -> “Irresistible”

    Girl standing next to you that you want to open. -> “You totally just farted…”

    You ask for directions to the bookstore (can’t remember where I got this one from). -> My copy of the holy bible is torn from so many readings. Do you know where the bookstore is?

    The big trick to it all is, “It doesn’t matter if she cums, stays, lays or prays. Whatever happens, your toes are still tappin’!” -Damone

    Also, don’t think of some crazy long story to tell her about how amazing she looks and how you just strolled on over, it sounds goofy. No body gives a fuck. Brevity is the soul of wit and those statements are usually what pops in your mind when you first see a situation. Another way to put is not to look at her but instead at what she’s (or someone else) is doing.

    Finally, if you really suck you can always try taking inhibitory neurotransmitter called “Phenibut”, just don’t mix it with alcohol.

  3. You didn’t hv a student in 4 yrs that didn’t kn what to say. ( all ur students knew kn what to say ) I don’t understand why “don’t kn what to say” is most common question if all ur students knew what to say. Is this a typo error , Tony?
    Your last sentance in 1st paragraph doesn’t make sence to me if “don’t kn what to say” is most common question. For the record “don’t kn what to say” is myself , also. Thanks , Tony.

  4. I discovered a really good technique I want to share with the Guys reading this blog. At the annual xmas party with my colleagues we have this game where everybody buys a present and then we roll dice for them etc. Its typical sort of thing where we would buy “funny” presents etc.

    I started out gaming the girl working in the store, telling her what i was after etc, flirted heavily with her, and asked if she had something really stupid i could bring to this event. I told her i dont even like my colleagues that much in a jokey way so if she could find me some real crap i would appreciate it. She laughed and i laughed with her and touch her arm as soon as i said that. I didnt ask for her number in the end as i figured she wasnt hot enough. I ended up buying a poster of Justin bieber and some lube.

    Now, what i did afterwards, I i walked around in the mall and even on the street stopping girls with the phrase “Can I ask you a question?” then i explain them about the situation and ask if they find it funny. I follow up with “as you can see Im dont really like my colleagues that much”, then you can say “you seemed like a smart girl and figured your opinion was worth something” If I find them to be very pretty i will just say so, and if they feel awkward i just say sorry i didnt mean to make you feel awkward but its true. Its great stuff, and Works really well. you take pressure of them by asking their opinion about something you bought, Then once thats established you escalate further. Got some pretty decent numbers and will be fun to see what they lead to. This can also be adapted to all kinds of other Things youve bought youd like their opinion of, just use your creatitivity. If anyone actually use this technique pls let us all know how it works for you, Peace 🙂

  5. Damn, this was dope! It’s refreshing to hear some truth from a PUA blog. Too much garbage out there nowadays – Awesome post.

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