Over the years I’ve had countless women email me “questions.” Unfortunately most of the questions are posed in the form of an attack or insult. I’m growing tired of replying to these so I’ve created a faq.
The faq can also be applied to mainstream journalists, who often come in the guise as curious truth seekers, but are actually looking to create clickbait by accosting us with this nonsense.
Pickup wasn’t created to make people tweet happily. We’re very aware that mainstream media, and what we call “Feminists, Manginas, Social Justice Warriors and Whiteknights,” hate us. It doesn’t matter what we say, they will still hate us, and call us mean names. We just don’t care, and will keep doing whatever it takes to hook up with attractive women.
1. Are you teaching men how to sleep with an endless variety of women and then dumping them because you’re a misogynistic womanizer? Or are you teaching them to have a “real” and “meaningful” relationship?
I teach charisma, and provide encouragement towards action. What men do with this skill is up to them. If they want to bang a bunch of women and not call them back, that’s up to them. If they want to find their special snowflake and couple up, that’s up to them. I ask women to imagine the possibility that men can find equal happiness in multiple, short term, sexually based relationships as they might in a long term monogamous relationship.
I’m sorry if you were hurt in the past by some jerk who dumped you or didn’t call you back. It happens to everyone, men included. I’ve been dumped and played by many, many women. That’s why I learned seduction – so that when I meet girlfriend material I’ll have the skills to keep her interested. Until I find her I will keep sleeping with random, beautiful women and teaching other men how to do this too.
Until you have sex with a man, you don’t have a relationship – you have a friendship. As for a “real and meaningful relationship” I ask you to define “real.” What is “real” to someone like Leonardo Dicaprio might not be “real” to Chris, the 22 year old art school grad who works at Starbucks and has slept with two women in his life. In order for him to find and keep “the one,” he needs an education, and that involves seducing, bedding and spending time with many, many women. If you want a guy who has slept with one woman in his life, has never hurt anyone’s feelings, and doesn’t practice approaching women…well, have fun with him. I hope you’re a patient girl who’s cool with jealousy, missionary style sex with a constant unchanging rhythm, and a sickening neediness that grows over the course.
In my years as a coach I have not met many men who weren’t looking for a girlfriend. It’s just that the better you become at seduction, the pickier you become. And then those hotter girls are harder to keep as a girlfriend. So you keep chasing prettier girls. Except the prettier girls have more and better options, so to keep them around you need to improve your game and lifestyle. That’s how it goes.
2. You’re a douchebag
If you say so. But we’ve probably not spent much time together, have we? It is possibly a projection. I have friends, male, female, old, young, gay, straight. I’m a slightly left leaning, and an americano junkie. In my free time I like art shows, long trips, cuddling, swimming, live music, beach days, and so forth. I also like flirting and I’m skilled on my good days. Good on my bad days. Other days I don’t care or think much about it. There’s other things to do.
3. How many women have you slept with?
Quite a few. Up until I was 27 it was about 12 in my life. I slept with fifteen more women the second year after I discovered the pua community. I’m not that obsessed with it anymore. I think I got it mostly out of my system. I still have a deep rooted masculine drive to bed as many beautiful women as possible, and I don’t think that will ever go away, and I’m not ashamed of it. I hope I get to bed many, many more women in the near future. Until some girl convinces me to stop and be a good boy.
4. You should just be yourself.
I am myself. Only a better version compared to 7 seven years ago, when I didn’t know about the seduction community and I was a shy introvert who was friend zoned by every girl I crushed on.
5. You are promoting street harassment.
Street annoyance perhaps. No more so then Green Peace, Amnesty International, Free Hugs, street beggars, and so forth.
6. You are promoting rape culture.
Seducing and raping are not even remotely related. I promote rape fantasy maybe. Nothing wrong with that, if it’s what you’re into.
7. You probably don’t have a girlfriend.
Not at the moment, and it’s fantastic. I do what I want, when I want. I have several girls who I hang out with once, maybe twice a week. We eat food, watch movies, have sex and go back to our separate lives. Maybe one day I’ll have a monogamous girlfriend again. For now I prefer short and passionate relationships and the freedom to date multiple women, guilt free.
8. Do you teach women?
I converse with several open minded females who have approached me. Instead of lashing out at the pickup artists, you should talk to them and learn their techniques. A girl with pickup artist skills is a girl I would like to spend more time with. Learning what the puas teach will help you to understand and relate to men. You will become a better lover and girlfriend if you stop lashing out at men and their interests and instead learn how to seduce them. Mainstream advice is garbage. Stick with what actually works, not what makes people feel happy about themselves.
9. This would only work on drunk or insecure girls.
You think this because you have no comprehension of what I teach. You don’t know what “this” is. You have a model based on a story created by your egoic fears. If you were to read my blog, my books, and perhaps other experts from the seduction community and then give me your opinion on what works, then perhaps I might give a poop about your opinion.
10. You’re a misogynist. You hate women.
Then why would I spend a decade teaching men how to relate to them? You annoy me sometimes, yes. I’m often dissapointed by women, yes. But I don’t hate women and I don’t know anyone who does. Not in my social circle anyway. I know plenty of self-described man haters though. Mostly abuse cases. Sad but true. Some men hate women, but mostly because they can’t get laid. This is the wrong mentality and will not help us. Positivity is the key.
11. You manipulate women.
Yes I do. I manipulate women into becoming incredibly intrigued and turned on by me. It’s an amazing skill that anyone can learn, women included. It’s called charm. You can use the same skills in business, long term relationships, family, or any social situation. But I mostly use it to seduce women, because I’m a single bachelor with a high sex drive.
12. You just want to get laid.
Men are expected to approach and seduce the woman, so the woman should be expected to ensnare us with her charms. Learn how to communicate with men, how to flirt, how to be a good girlfriend. It’s really easy. We’re simple. And if you’re being repeatedly used for your body, maybe you should step back and ask yourself why? Self-awareness is sexy. So is critical thought.
13. You see women as objects.
Do you see yourself as an object? You attracted me. Would I be interacting, socializing, with an object or a person of depth?
14. You’re narcissistic.
Mostly as a teaching mechanism, to show men how to think differently. Pride and narcissism when utilized as a tool are powerful motivators of personal transformation. As long as you’re a little bit conscious, awake, present, etc.
15. Why not just “Let it happen naturally?”
If you know a better way for single men who lack confidence with women, to learn about women, other than by approaching many, many women, please let me know. Being yourself and just letting it happen means nothing useful to a guy who has heart palpitations at the thought of approaching a pretty girl. Immersion therapy is the only way.
16. What about “Consent?”
We are not rapists. We’re flirtists. If the girl doesn’t want to flirt, we politely move on to the next girl. We look for girls that like us.
17. You’ve offended me
18. This other pickup guy did this offensive thing. Are you like him?
19. This is sexist
I don’t think so. I don’t know why people say that a heterosexual male, learning how to approach women is sexist. I guess it is. Whatever.
20. Do you use “Negs?”
Yes. My favourite is, “You have nice hair. Do you have any split ends?” It’s good for really pretty girls who have a lot of attitude, but you have a suspicion that she likes you a little bit, and need to show her you have standards too.
21. I don’t like that you use negs.
22. This stuff is all a scam created to get some poor lonely guys money.
That’s right. And the thousands and thousands of documented testimonials scattered all over the Internet are all fakes.
23. You wrote this thing on your blog and it offended me.
24. My friend was approached by a guy and he was weird and creepy and said xyz.
He is not very good at it.
25. I met this guy once and he was really natural and fun and never made me feel weird. I slept with him and felt comfortable opening up to him. He didn’t need that pickup stuff.
He is a good pickup artist. He either learned it by going out with his friends to bars, or he read lots of books, attended bootcamps and worked for many years at it.
26. You don’t respect women.
I respect people who earn it. Man or woman. Respect has nothing to do with a man’s romantic desires.
27. It’s creepy
We don’t practice pickup, dating, seduction, to make society like us. We don’t give a crap what society thinks. We want to date, and bed, beautiful women. Some of us want to have lots of sex, with various women. Some of us want a wife. We are not evil, sexist, chauvinist, women haters out looking to rape your daughters. We’re just normal men with high sex drives. Most of us have small social circles, or work in tech jobs that have few females around. We are willing to do whatever it takes to become men that women desire, and that involves making many mistakes.
Very few of us call ourselves “Pickup Artists.” It’s just a label. There are hundreds of theories, methods, books. There is no one “key” to figuring out seduction. We do it because it’s fun, and it works.