Have you been stuck, or growing really slow in your approaching?
Or would you like to learn day game fast?
(The following is a guest article by my new coach, Julian Burecci)
Have you been trying to figure out why, or how to get more gains? Are you working hard to no avail? This article is going to give you a process and way of approaching your approaches that will 100x your growth and results.
The Analytical Mind And Learning Day Game Fast
The problem is that most guys in this game are doing it completely from their analytical mind, and the analytical mind is never the reason a woman gives you her number or drops her panties for you. The analytical mind is not where attraction takes place. Attraction takes place in feelings and emotional transference.
Again, some guys know this but they still feel absolutely horrible when they approach, which by the way can still make your approaches effective, read on to learn why and how. In this article you’ll learn:
- How to process beliefs and emotions from each approach
- The proper mind-set and frame to develop
- Why your approaches fall flat
- Why you are getting hard rejections and constant painful blow outs
- How attraction actually works, and what creates connection
- How to transmit turn on energy and get her wet from the first moment
Firstly, if you struggle to learn day game fast, or have any women in your life at all it’s simply because you have stacks of negative feelings and a belief system that won’t allow for it.
Additionally, you probably don’t have an ounce of vulnerability in your body either. With all the negative beliefs we have in any area, we transfer the feeling frequencies in them.
The Emotional Scale
Let me explain that better, there is an emotional scale that goes from Apathy, Grief, Fear, Lust, Anger, Pride into Courage, Acceptance and Peace. Every area of our lives is somewhere on this scale. So when you have, for example, a victim belief about women like “I can’t get the women I want”, which is between Apathy and Grief, you will transmit that feeling frequency in your approaches.
Approaching in the beginning should not be about actually getting a number or getting laid. Most guys are desperate for fast results, but from this emotional level you’re just going to attract really awful partners (if you even do) who will bring you down and hurt you.
We should look at approaching in the beginning as personal development and practise. This takes immense pressure off and also removes the attachment to outcome already making us more natural, open and authentic in the way we show up to women.
Learning Day Game Fast
Approaching in the beginning, if you want to grow, and learn day game fast, should only be for stirring up negative emotions to go sit with right after to just feel. Feeling is healing. Also, a quick note for the guy who is terrified of approaching, I’m gonna give you small bite sized chunks to get you confident in approaching you should start out using this process with simple things like:
- Saying hi to 10 women, then feeling after each hello.
- Ask 10 girls for directions, and then feel what comes up after each.
- Ask another 10 girls for directions and then see if you can hold a normal conversation with them for a minute. Then two. Then three or more. Then again, after each approach FEEL what comes up for a bit.
- Now, move onto genuine compliments. Such as the way she moves. Women are more receptive because it shows you’re actually present. They hear “you’re so beautiful” and “you’re so hot/sexy” all damn day. They’ll just gloss over until you develop actual feeling when you say that.
- After each approach a REALLY powerful way to bring up the feelings you want to process out to be better is ask this question as you’re feeling “can I welcome the part of me that wants approval from women?” this will bring up those direct feelings for releasing. This will grow you fast.
- You can also turn that question into a meditation and allow whatever part of your body reacts to just react, as you feel it, it will process and the way you show up with women will completely transform.
Now, you can do some more direct approaches, you’ll be much more comfortable after processing all those surface feelings. This is the path to growing fast. I know men that would do 20 approaches everyday for a year and they often end up worse without knowing why.
Running Girl To Girl
The reason why is because they’re just running from girl to girl like a bulldog and completely in their head. This is also why women will often reject you hard, because they can’t feel any emotions coming from you, or all the anxiety that you’re not acknowledging gets transferred to them and they want to get the fuck away from you. This practise can be implemented in any area of your life to help you learn day game fast.
Let’s now talk about an effective frame. A lot of men have a belief that approaching a girl in the day is “creepy” which breeds shame. It’s also not helpful that society has all these “PC” and “#metoo” type movements portraying men as rapists and pigs.
However, the frame you should develop is that going over to that girl to talk to her because you’re interested is COMPLETELY NATURAL! It’s nature. If she has a problem with you approaching her, that’s her own insecurity. Also, women feel anxious around men too.
Women Are Intuitive
We often think that women are imperturbable, but they often feel even more than we do. That’s why they cling to guys who feel good in their body which is what you’ll develop from the feeling exercises I was talking about before. That’s also why women love athletes, they’re in their body, they’re grounded and they enjoy their body. They aren’t in their heads.
Now, women have been learning to read faces and body language since they were little girls. They are the intuitive gender. So imagine that your face is a big billboard for how you’re feeling, and so your body is too.
That’s why a good interaction could go extremely sour so fast, have you experienced this? There is a mind-set to develop that will end that and it’s something I got from Zan Perrion’s “The Alabaster Girl” (I highly recommend this book, it helps you build the feeling of seduction).
- Do I like her VS does she like me?
- Is this girl just a pretty face? Or does she have substance?
- Does she actually have anything interesting to talk about?
- Be more curious about her than being worried about how you feel, this takes a lot of pressure off and she will feel your presence which is attractive.
An insecure guy is looking for her approval, and that’s exactly why we can feel so uncomfortable in an approach, or in any social interaction. Instead, build the frame “Do I like her?”, and think “What do I like about her?”, really be curious to see if she is more than just a pretty face.
Your body language and facial expressions will automatically come off more confident and solid and it will flip the script and get her to seek your approval. Women like when they feel challenged by a man. She will see you as very different than most guys who approach her.
If you’re trying to learn day game fast, be challenging
Also, if you’re nervous or sad, she can feel it. Most guys think they’re can act cool and hide their feelings. Not true. Simply call it out confidently. An example is “Hey, I’m feeling really anxious right now but I had to step through it and meet you.” this will actually develop attraction because you’re being real and vulnerable.
She has those same feelings so she will not only see you as honest and straightforward, she will also connect to you more. If you don’t know what to say next, just call it out! It actually creates a deeper connection and then things flow naturally.
Now, another thing guys just don’t understand in attraction is tension. Stepping into tension is the biggest turn on to a woman. This goes back to tribal days, the men who went out to hunt (stepping into tension) we’re the ones who got mates because this demonstrates that they are providers. Even in our highly evolved and safe modern society, this is still the driver of attraction.
Just the fact that you can step to her already makes you 100x more attractive than even “pretty boys” because you’re stepping into your masculine. The masculine is made to manage tension.
I suggest practising feeling tension, because the more aware you are of tension the more you can play with it in your approaches to really turn her on and get her attention. Here are some ways to practise stepping into tension:
- When someone is walking down the street eating something, stop them and ask you can have a bite and stand in the feelings. Ground as best you can and notice that the more solid you are the harder it is for people to say no to you. When you get really good at it , it’s actually a lot of fun! And good for learning day game fast.
- Say hi to strangers and ask them weird questions like “what’s your favourite colour?”, then make stuff up about the answer and keep the conversation going as long as you can while feeling the tension.
- Find one thing everyday that makes you uncomfortable (4-7/10) and then step into it with presence, look for and feel the tension.
- When ordering coffee at a café, take a bit longer and notice the tension that comes up, feel it and work on grounding it.
- Say hi to 10 strangers in a row and feel your legs as you do it, make eye contact as well.
- When you do all of these practises always feel into your legs, this grounds the energy.
These are not only practises that will improve your approach abilities; they will also significantly build your self-confidence! Women like rich men not because of their money but because they tend to step into tension, which is why they are rich.
Nothing you want exists in your current comfort zone. This develops your masculine edginess that women all over the world find absolutely irresistible.
That’s what real men do, beyond all the macho bullshit about masculinity, feeling is important and if you can’t feel yourself, neither can she. There will be no connection, and tension is the pipe where emotional connection flows through. Additionally, most teachers in the dating arena teach very mental concepts, it’s all about taking and action and feeling. We only grow through experience.
Lastly, to help you learn day game fast, here is a more esoteric concept, but it’s extremely accurate. If you have sexual shame, she will feel shame if you can even attempt to bring up sexuality or advance in any sexual manner.
The problem is that our “turn on” is turned off. Our sexual energy, creativity and “mojo” come from the second chakra. Have you ever felt nervous in communicating with a woman?
Notice that the emotions and sensations arise in the stomach (below the rib cage), that’s your solar plexus, the point of personal power, self-esteem and confidence. Meditating on these areas will bring up suppressed and repressed emotions, and you’ll process them out by simply allowing them to be there without wanting to change them.
The same goes with the second chakra, that’s where we emotionally connect and that’s where sexuality is rooted. If it’s blocked you’ll have a lot of trouble accessing its gifts.
Meditation Helps Game
So I recommend a daily meditation practise of at least 20 minutes on these areas to break them open. Simply keep your awareness on one or the other. You’ll be very surprised at what starts coming up as you try to learn day game fast.
You can also visualize approaching a beautiful girl and notice what happens to these areas, and then just feel and allow the feelings to be there. You’ll notice that they disappear.
Each time you process a feeling, the next one comes up, what you release is gone for good. It’s like a Kleenex box, you take a tissue out and the next one comes up but eventually there will be no more. It will just be open and it will change your life in ways beyond your current belief.
Experiment with this process on your heart and throat as well because those are very vital areas.
Now, take this information and USE it to learn day game fast! Remember, you can read theory until you’re blue in the face, I’m giving you simple and practical methods that will 100x your growth.
Game is Personal Development
Lastly, stop treating approaching as a way to get a cheap lay, or a girlfriend from a place of neediness or insecurity because that will never help you. Both you and her will suffer. Approach approaching as a mode of personal development and becoming a better man, the man that the world needs!