Design a First Date That Leads To Sex

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Posted January 27, 2014 by Tony D in Dating

magicLet it be understood that this blog is for entertainment purposes only. The advice given is in constant flux and what might help me one day, might not the next. On that note, about 75% of my first dates end in sex. This isn’t because I’m some big player, or have amazing skillz with women. It’s because I’m prepared, and expect to get laid. I facilitate it. Instead of going into a date with the hope of impressing, or winning favour – I give her an enjoyable experience that naturally leads to guilt-free sex. In this article I will speak plainly about my experience so that you may emulate it.

Note. I don’t need to get laid. I’m there to enjoy a woman’s company and experienced enough to understand that many women also want to be ravaged on a first date. Many women are looking for an opportunity for easy, guilt-free, non-judgemental, first date sex. True story.

Facilitate sex, not objections

Minimalist Texting

I text as little as possible. Many women I meet aren’t as old as I am, or well read. I’m a bit of a weirdo (we all are); a reformed geek and my  humour often fails over text. Because she’s looking for an excuse to blow me off, If I make a joke that she doesn’t understand she will almost always interpret that I’m a creepy stalker who wants to cut her tits off and use them as bath toys (see what I mean about my humour?) So don’t use text for anything other than setting up a date. Don’t try to be witty, eventually you will fail. If you don’t have enough attraction and she’s not investing in the text exchange, it’s because your in real life (IRL) game is off.

Note, once you’re in a relationship you can text more. But you’re a busy dude right? Be busy. Have hobbies, a side business, art project, friends. Have a life that keeps you off your text. Let them meet you IRL if they want your energy and time.

First Date: My House 

I picked this up from my friend Eddy Baller. He asks girls, “Do you like Italian food?” If they say yes, he invites them over for home cooked dinner. Surprisingly, this first date works very well. I was shocked how many women would skip the whole going for coffee, or a walk, and just come over for a free meal.

First Date Option 2

For when she doesn’t want to come over. This rarely happens because if she doesn’t, it usually means she isn’t interested and is wasting my time. I pick a funky bar close to my place and meet her there for a drink or two. This might cost me $10. If she wants to drink more than that, she pays for it herself. We split the bill. I do not pay for dinner. She pays for her own food. This makes it easy to say, “My place isn’t far. I have wine.” 90% of the time the woman is into this. Saves money and we get to cuddle and make out. She knows this. Paying for dinner is bad because it sets up a provider frame and gives away your power.

Do you remember all those Hollywood movies where the guy ends up on the doorstep, invites the girl up and she say’s “No thanks?” If she likes you, she almost always say’s “Yes please.” But you don’t want to wait for the end of the date to kiss her. Try to kiss her in the first thirty minutes. Get it out of the way. “But what if she doesn’t like it when I try to kiss her?” Be willing to walk. If she likes you she will want to break the kiss barrier as well.

After a drink, walk to a park, or a different bar. Walking builds trust and rapport. Then go to your house, or her house. Whichever is closer. But your house is better for a first try.

Prepare The Chateau

Vancouver is hella expensive and I don’t have a fancy apartment. But I keep my place tidy. Before a date I make my bed, clean the bathroom, do my dishes and vacuum. Cleanliness encourages women to take their clothes off. Oh yeah, delete your cookies if you browse lots of porn, just in case she needs to check her Facebook.

For easy access, condoms and lube are kept under my bed. I put a bottle of water on the bedside table along with clean hand towels. I have candles throughout the room for mood lighting and I use grooveshark.com for music. Lately I like The XX or the new Arcade Fire album.

Don’t be embarrassed about lighting candles or setting music like, “What if she knows I want to bang her?” She knows anyway. She would lose respect for you if you didn’t at least try.

Seduction

When she arrives she sits on my couch and then we chat while I cook. Or we have a glass of wine. I use this time to cross the imaginary physical barrier. I’ll talk about her rings and hold her hands, or talk about her stockings and graze her legs. If she’s cool with that I’ll give her a hug. Then I’ll put on a movie. Once the movie starts I’ll put my arm around her, lean back and let her cuddle me. About ten minutes later we’re making out. I just move my face towards hers until our lips touch. About an hour into the movie we’re usually very horny from cuddles and make outs that it’s not hard to get into the bedroom. I just stand up, hold out my hand and say, “Let’s go in here.” This doesn’t mean I’m getting laid, but that’s ok. Cuddles and make outs are cool. But I usually get laid.

After we bang we hang out. Sometimes they go, and sometimes they stay. It depends on both of our moods, and our compatibility. If I really want my alone time and they don’t get that, I say, “I would love to invite you to spend the night, but I have a big day tomorrow and have a hard time sleeping with someone new in my bed.” They usually understand and bounce. Many girls don’t want to spend the night anyway and are looking for an excuse to go home, to their own bed, and Facebook, and reality tv or Bigfoot porn.

When you’re on a date, instead of asking “what should I do next?” Ask, “What do I want?” This is a golden rule of all game. Follow it and create the sort of date you would enjoy most. If that involves riding a carousel, then group yoga and an expensive dinner on you, that’s fine. But I’m there to meet a sex partner, not an activity partner. And sex leads to a sexual relationship so it’s in your best interest to knock boots asap.

That’s how most of my dates go down. If you’re my future girlfriend and this is how I Seduced you…

Hi Baby.

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8 Comments


  1.  
    OneBearTwoDicks

    Just wanted to point out, it’s “The XX”, not “The XXX”

    Think that might have just been a Freudian slip while typing. Or, maybe this is a new band I should start looking into…




  2.  
    Gman

    How many girls accept an invite to your place to cook for first dates if there isn’t that much rapport or comfort built yet? For example you met them on the street via day game and had a quick 5-10 min chat.




  3.  
    Freddie

    Thanks Tony, I really love your blog. You’ve taught me and inspired me so much with your blog, If i ever get into some serious money I will donate to you for sure.

    I have a very effective way which gets me laid alot on first dates, I usually invite for drinks etc and we will go to a few bars. I will be funny, flirt with them, I will make sure they know that Im into them and find them physically attractive. If they find it off putting and sleazy i just re-calibrate and talk about serious subjects and let them talk about Family bla bla whatever. I might kiss them before we go back to my place, but that depends on chemistry/atmosphere etc, i have to judge each case by itself. Then as we are walking from the last bar, I just ask, hey do you want to come back to my place, i have some wines, we can listen to some music, chill etc. It can be uncomfortable for some guys to ask this, but seriously WHO cares, just be a dog. Just ask her like youre asking the waiter at Starbucks for a croissant with your coffe.

    Then back in my apartment, with all the candles lit, and my own designed playlist for female company, i will give her a drink, talk for a short while, and the i will just lean in and kiss her. The point is to do this confidently like you are ready for her there and then, if she kiss me back, great, and if she doesnt, i will just smile smirkily because im a dog and badass anyways for just trying to kiss her like that. So, either way I win. However, its very rare that they dont kiss back. If they refuse to come to my Apartment, i will kiss them when i say goodbay and maybe try one more time depending if we make out etc. If they hesitate when asking to go to my Apartment, Ill just say, come on, im not dangerous, its just some wine and music, i wont bite (unless u ask me to), Always have in your head that you are the wolf and she is the sheep, it turns them on. Once you have them kissing with u in your Apartment you will always get laid. Never be scared to show the girls that youre attracted to them and desire them physically, and more importantly, that you are a man ready to make the moves in order to get what you want.




  4.  
    Gerhard

    Tony, I had not been able to read your pieces in a while but this is fantastic. Props man keep it up, I love that this piece is so direct and you breakdown your reasoning in a great manner. Take care man!




  5.  
    captainchardonnay

    A trick is something a whore does for money




  6.  
    smith

    Hey Tony! Just checking in here, I don’t comment often but i’ve read all of your articles since the past year. This one in particular is awesome, it’s true that results go up once you figure out the convenient logistics of a first date. I’m wondering though, do you continue to plan dates with chicks once you’ve had sex wth them? how do you follow up?




  7.  
    Tim Garrison

    Wow , you guys are awesome. All I get is phone numbs , from day- game. Getting phone numbers is fun also , but not as much fun as you guys are having ! I do plan on poking one this year. That is my goal. An Asian girl / woman , just one cutie or one sexy Asian woman. I think that’s a good goal for me, That would be wonderful , a little Korean girl that would let me touch her or a tall sexy Asian woman 45 , I would like. Eleven months to go , bros. Pray for me please.
    I had a 45 min date with a 20 year old Korean girl , couple days ago. I had number closed her a week ago & met her on Robson st. for the date . I got a bit of a hug goodbye , when we parted. I texted her today for another date , she hasn’t replied back. I went to an Asian dance last Sunday & had a couple dances with a sexy 50 year old. I phoned her after the dance for a tea date , she said “I busy”.
    Good for you guys , you have my respect. Take care.
    Ps: thank-you for the instruction & the motivation.





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