I’ve harped on and on about the newbie’s inability to hold eye contact, (as nothing displays insecurity as much) but haven’t really touched on the power of deliberately taking it away.
It’s an old Jedi mind trick; essentially, when you have the woman entranced with your witty banter, and powerful eye gaze…take it away.
Just stop at a high point, and feign disinterest.
Look away, around the room, at a pigeon on the street, at anything but her.
The effect should be that you are bored, or not interested. This should cause her to chase your fleeting attention (if there is the slightest interest on her part.)
You can do the takeaway verbally as well.
I was talking about seduction with a female friend of mine, and she was dismissive of this wisdom. So unwittingly on her part, I demonstrated.
First I dropped a bunch of cold-reads on her through text:
“You know what I noticed about you?” I said.
“What?” she replied.
“You have very high mental energy. You’re always fidgeting, and your mind skips from one topic to the next. It’s not a bad thing, it just means you have a curious mind.”
“Tell me more!” (hooked)
“You’re very stubborn sometimes, and strong willed.”
“Yes I am.”
“But you know what I noticed more than anything?”
“Oh man, I really noticed this about you.”
“…” (I didn’t answer)
“What? Tell meeeee!”
“Oh, I’ll tell you later, something came up.”
“No! Tell me! Tell me now!”
Then I told her she’s very susceptible to cold-reads and takeaways.
When you employ a subtle takeaway, even with eye contact, it must be at a highpoint. If you do a takeaway at a low emotional point, you’ll just lose her interest. She won’t chase.
Always be a challenge. If you’re too willing, to easy to figure out, women grow bored.
Of course, this only applies before you’ve slept with her. Once you’ve slept with her, she’ll backwards rationalize why she likes you, or even loves you. Then you won’t have to employ so much psychological mind trickery.
The key is to show that you don’t take yourself too seriously, and you’re not over invested. At the same time, know what you want, and where you’re going.
You want the girl, but you don’t NEED the girl.
Hot women are so used to having men dote, and plead, and beg, and be 24/7 available. By simply displaying the slightest boredom, or disinterest, or unwillingness to comply and please, you set yourself apart from the hordes of needy beta males she’s so sick of.
Another playful verbal take away is the dismissal of opinion:
You: “What do you like better? Chocolate or Vanilla?”
You: “Gross. You like chocolate? Lol. We’re done. I’m done with you. Get out of my life.”
You: “Did you see Game of Thrones last night?”
Her: “I don’t like Game of Thrones.”
You: “I’m done with you. Go away. Shut up.”
Of course the humorous undertone may be lost in this writing. But this sort of dismissal of opinion is meant to be funny. It’s a more direct takeaway—the taking away of approval. Most women won’t chase your approval here, but it sets up a polarity of playful conflict, which can then be resolved. It increases sexual tension, ideally.
I’m in Vancouver. Still chugging away at this new book. I’m available for coaching in Vancouver, Toronto and Montreal. Contact me for a free thirty minute consultation.