How long will it take to learn pickup? It’s one of my most commonly asked questions. It’s a loaded one. How long will it take you to develop charm and confidence? There’s a lot of debate on natural vs nurtured talent. I believe that most guys can elevate their success with women, and life, simply by applying the information.
Most guys getting into game theory are totally green—rookies. Your two biggest concerns are, “crippling AA,” and, “what to say.” But with enough practice, these become secondary concerns.
In the beginning, the learning curve is steep. You have major epiphanies with every approach, you’re really excited to get a phone number and the world is your, umm, oyster.
Then when your AA is gone you discover most numbers are flakes, you’re epiphanies are few and far between, and you seemingly stop progressing. This is the intermediate stage.
Guys at the intermediate stage tend to get frustrated with approaching, and rightly. It’s a lot of work to go out day and night, approaching mostly friendly, but unreceptive girls. You’ve read all the Ebooks, you’ve watched the in-field footage, you’ve put in your time…so why aren’t you getting consistent results?
The main reason in my humble opinion, you are still in transformation. The year or more of experience has created a wealth of reference memories, but your, “soul,” hasn’t transformed yet. It’s something in your eyes, in the way you carry yourself. Real confidence only comes with repeated success, and failure. If you have too much early success, you become dependent on validation, if you have too much early failure, you become jaded and disillusioned
No men want to hear they should keep practicing, but have you ever heard of an athlete going pro in one, or two years? When you’re shooting for the hottest girls, it’s like playing in the NFL. If you’re shooting for mildly attractive girls, it’s like playing for the minors. A guy that has only been practicing game for two years, without solid base-confidence or competency, is still playing in the little leagues.
Also, many guys spend so much time working on their approach, they forget the basics like style and grooming, body language, vocal tonality, daygame, social circle development, physical game, dance game, health and fitness, lifestyle, and verbal improv. In pickup, there are many skillsets to master. They focus exclusively on the numbers game and then get frustrated and end up on puahate saying pickup made them weird.
Going from intermediate to advanced is the trickiest. I consider myself advanced, and I didn’t realize how behind my own egoic vision I was until I backpacked SE Asia for four months. It took me 120 days of hitting on foreign backpackers, living with girls in bungalows, and spending a shit load of time talking to women and sleeping with new, hotter girls, until I felt I made the step. Hell, maybe I’m not even there yet, and I teach this stuff.
How long will it take?
Considering you practice four to seven days a week, with breaks on occasion, the average time span of focused practice and advancement is:
Rookie to Newbie, 4-8 weeks.
Newbie to Intermediate, 2-3 years.
Intermediate to Advanced, 3-6 years years.
Advanced to Guru, 10+ years.
I believe the term, “Guru,” is a vague title slapped on by marketers. However, the most successful men I know don’t go out of their way to approach women. They have over ten years experience, and have been with more than fifty, usually in the hundreds of women. They usually have lifestyles that grant them access to beautiful women, or are in long-term relationships with one or more cool girls.
Beyond advanced, guys should look more to lifestyle. Most guru level guys travel regularly; have cool jobs, large social circles, or high status hobbies that they’ve spent many years developing. They make good money, are in good shape, and are extremely confident. When you talk to these guys, you want to be their friend, and you don’t know why. They’re just that charming.
I once vented my frustrations to a female friend of mine. I said, “What do I have to do to get these really hot girls with consistency?”
She said, “You should go to the Mexican desert and spend a month living with a shaman.”
I still haven’t done this. The shaman part I mean.
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